Trump And The Briar Patch Of Impeachment

Br'er Donald in his briar patch.  Art © Jim Moore

As impolitic as the stories are today, the Uncle Remus books, written in the late 1800s by Joel Chandler Harris, provided many generations of kids like me—who grew up not knowing what was or was not politically correct—a Reconstruction era brand of Aesop’s Fables that featured a trickster we rooted for. He was Br’er Rabbit, and he managed, story by story, to get the best of his antagonists—Br’er Fox and Br’er Bear. Br’er Rabbit was not always the winner in those battles (see The Tar Baby), but he won more than he lost.

Today, there is a new Br’er Rabbit, still a trickster, but hardly one we should ever be rooting for. He is Br’er Donald, and he is dangerous. His antagonists are not folksy woodland creatures like Br’er Fox or Br’er Bear; they are, instead, Democrats in the House of Representatives and in the Senate, and members of the mainstream media—for the most part—who are bent on catching and dispatching the trickster. They face enormous odds in their quest to banish the rabid rabbit.

Br’er Donald’s champions have erected a defensive bulwark around themselves and their delusionally-created country. It is a fortress constructed of stones of ignorance loosely bound with a thin mortar of supremely white nationalistic rhetoric. Surrounding this bastion of braggadocio and false bravado is a tangled and nearly impenetrable briar patch of lies and denial, planted and nurtured by the likes of Mitch McConnell and his lock-step acolytes in the House. Atop the ramparts of this ignoble redoubt, Br’er Donald’s supporters stand, megaphones in hand, praising and mimicking his divisive, hateful, and bullying rants. Their messaging is clear and frightening: Br’er Donald, an evil doppelganger of Br’er Rabbit of old, is a new trickster who is still winning (“hugely”) more than he is losing. And for that we should be concerned.

The ongoing drama that is the impeachment of a president, along with the bitter divisiveness that has overtaken political and social discourse in every quarter of the country, have as their common root cause one man bent on personal gain above all else; a mean and venal trickster who will stop at nothing to win, in part, because he believes—perhaps he knows—nothing will stop him.

I cannot adequately explain this through the clarity of logic or the recitation of facts, nor, despite their best efforts, can many of the country’s most astute chroniclers of the political scene. We all have our theories, which run the gamut from ascribing Br’er Donald’s behavior to a mental illness, to dredging up his twisted tutor, Br’er Roy Cohn, to his inability to read anything with understanding, to his total lack of interest in the flow and lessons of history. Perhaps there are elements of all those theories at work here, or perhaps Br’er Donald is just an insatiable devourer of other people’s treasure and humanity. Perhaps he just gets off on greed, gold, boorishness, cruelty, and power, in no particular order.

Whatever he is, Br’er Donald is most certainly a danger to the nation—a clear and present danger that so far has evaded accountability in great part due to the bizarre machinations of his devout adherents and enablers in Congress and among his voting base, both forces abetted and energized by certain media’s criminally irresponsible streaming forums.

What can Democrats and the bulk of concerned Americans do to put a halt to the destructive machinations of this hoodlum trickster? Impeachment? No, I think not.

In the Uncle Remus story of Br’er Fox and Br’er Rabbit and the briar patch, Br’er Rabbit has been trapped on a sticky tar baby built by Br’er Fox, who is ready to barbeque the rabbit. Ever the trickster, Br’er Rabbit plays counter-argument:

So Br’er Fox had caught Br’er Rabbit and this time Br’er Fox said he was going to cook Br’er Rabbit and eat him up for good! Br’er Rabbit was mighty scared. He begged, “Oh, Br’er Fox, I don’t care what you do with me, so long as you just don’t throw me in that briar patch over there. Go on and barbecue me up, Br’er Fox, but please don’t throw me in that briar patch.”

Br’er Fox said he was going to roast him anyhow, but when he went to hang Br’er Rabbit up over the fire, he found he didn’t have any string to tie him up with. “Well, I guess I can’t roast you,” Br’er Fox said. “I guess I’ll have to drown you instead.” Br’er Rabbit pleaded, “Oh, Br’er Fox, go ahead and drown me then, just so long as you don’t throw me into that briar patch!”

“Well,” said Br’er Fox, “it looks like there’s no water around here to drown you in. I guess I’ll skin you instead.” “Okay, Br’er Fox, no problem,” chattered Br’er Rabbit, “Go ahead and skin me, cut out my eyes, cut off my legs, just don’t throw me into that briar patch!”

By this time, Br’er Fox had gotten the idea that Br’er Rabbit really, really didn’t want to get anywhere near that briar patch. Br’er Fox wanted to hurt Br’er Rabbit as bad as he could, so he took Br’er Rabbit by the legs and threw him right smack into the middle of that briar patch. He heard a lot of rustling and crackling when Br’er Rabbit landed, and he waited around to see what terrible thing was going to happen.

But a few minutes later, he hears somebody calling, “Oh, yoo-hoo, Br’er Fox! Over here!” and he looks – and he sees Br’er Rabbit, sitting on a rock, combing the tar out of his fur with a stick. “Didn’t you know, Br’er Fox,” called Br’er Rabbit. “I was bred and born in the briar patch! Bred and born!” And he hopped away.

Now, let’s retell the story, but this time, substitute Br’er Democrat for Br’er Fox, Br’er Donald for Br’er Rabbit, and the impeachment for the briar patch. The role of the tar baby is played by the Constitution.

There is no doubt in my mind that president Trump and his Congressional flock want nothing more than for the Democrats to fling Trump into the briar patch of impeachment. As in the Uncle Remus tale, Trump will emerge from the thorns of a Senate trial completely unscathed and happy to once again having outwitted his pursuers. Trump and McConnell see clearly what the Democrats seem not to see at all: the president thrives amidst the stickers and brambles of his lies and treachery—he has debauched the Constitution and the Department of Justice, and his followers love him all the more for his misdeeds. 

There is a good chance that once Br’er Donald is proclaimed innocent by the cowards of the Senate, he will redouble his trickster ways to help the Republican Party destroy an enfeebled Democratic majority in the House, and add Republicans to the Senate (“so much winning!”).

As for Br’er Trump after he is reelected in 2020, he will stand atop his briar-surrounded rock and say, “Didn’t you know, Br’er Democrats. I was bred and born in the briar patch! Bred and born!”